Friday, April 29, 2005
so as I seemed to be rolling downhill faster and faster with the force of a heard of animals, I somehow slowed it down, and am beginning to push it back up the hill, the shitty, bumpy, dog-poop filled, but beautiful hill of my life. Yesterday was the DDay for me....I didn't know it was coming but there it was, it smacked me in the face.... but after a million tears and a bucket of snot later, I took a bath, laid with my ears submerged in the water..and I felt calm for once in a long time. So I am not giving up I have realized but pushing myself back into the life I want to live. Maybe I haven't been fair to the people that I love in Bemidji... but after doing something that I needed to do, I have found a new respect for them, and have learned that I don't have to be around people I don't like. Everything is a choice, I shouldn't have to waste my time with the unwanted depressants. I have been around crappy people here, around the people that make up this city, a big well-known city, and I didn't like it or them. The people back home, my friends and family are the people that I cherish, that I love and have deep respect for. I love you guys, I miss you so much, I will be so happy to be back with you......
|ericadawn |9:33 PM|
