Monday, September 13, 2004
okay...I know I haven't updated my blog forever...I just haven't been in the mood to sit and type. But I will set aside a couple minutes now...As most of you know, I am engaged to Paul...No I don't have a ring yet, so it isn't quite "official" but he asked me "Will you marry me?" while we were cuddling in bed when he came to visit. So many people ask me if I know what I am getting into and if I am ready to be with someone forever...and to tell the truth right now, I don't know how I would live my life without Paul being such a huge part of it. People don't think long distance relationships mean much, that they are too hard to maintain. But I believe that it is just making Paul and I stronger. We talk everyday for hours usually. How is that not a relationship?! He is the one I think of when I am happy, sad, mad or bored. He is the person I want to share every thought with and every moment with. So I know that I have made a lot of mistakes in my past, and I mean a lot....I suppose that is why I am boggled at how God still blessed me with Paul. I hope that my family will understand someday at the extent of my love for Paul. Instead of thinking of me as a child still. But Paul and I are strong, very strong with our relationship, we will last and last forever, that is why we are perfect for eachother and why he is my soulmate. For the first time in my life I feel complete. In the past I have always felt unhappy in some aspect of my life, I never treated my relationships with the respect that I should have, I threw out relationship after relationship, without a care in the world...I would watch guys get sad and tore up because of it while I sat there without a feeling about it. I thought there would never be a man out there I would truly be happy with, then Paul and I looked at eachother in a different light, and realized we are meant to be together. The happiest day of my life will be the day we promise our lives to eachother. Whether we have support or not, I will be happy to be in his arms day after day until forever.
Anyways, Nicole is having a hard time lately it seems with her relationships. But I believe there is a good guy she isn't giving enough of a chance, and that she is putting too much aside for a guy that seems to never come around. Nicole hang in there, I will support you in whatever you do, but just try not to set aside good people and a chance to find happiness with someone else, I know it gets scary meeting someone new, but you don't deserve what you are getting from the old relationship. :(
I have my first test on Friday in Consumer Chemistry .....bleh...blehhhhh!
I need to work out tonight horribly bad, I feel like such a fat ass....I just keep eating and not working out, I am going to end up in Guinness Book for the FATTEST BITCH IN THE WORLD.... nah but I feel like I will. I need to starve myself so that my stomach will start eating my ass. :)
Well tonight I better work out, tan, and go to the movie with Nicole, maybe do some studying for that test I have on Friday....otherwise I am going to kick my own ass. aight holla jiggas
|ericadawn |1:07 PM|
